She's suffering from Noassatall (No Ass At All)! We have the cure

Some people were blessed with fame and others.... well, were blessed with an ASS.

Dear Miley Cyrus,

 The next time you decided to shake what your momma failed to give you please stop and think WWJD? What Would Jenny (aka J.LO aka the Queen of big Asses) Do? Next time (God please don't let there be a next time) spare us and yourself the embarrassment!

Since we don't totally hate you we'd like to offer you a little gift:

 Booty Pop! These magical underwear will make your deflated, saggy, no-having-ass self twerk to your fullest capability! Who knows, Juicy J may even give you a college scholarship now. Go ahead, enter his contest, you got my vote already.

 Anyone hungry all of a sudden?

-Socially Arkward